Top Ten Narcissistic Mothers on Screen
And the winner is…
Gladys Cooper in Now Voyager
This is the one that will make you cry. Bette Davis plays Charlotte Vale, the hapless victim of the coldest bitch of a mother you have seen in a long time. Watch Charlotte slowly transform from ugly duckling to beautiful swan with the help of Claude Rains. But she still doesn’t get her man…well, we have the moon, let’s not ask for the stars.
2. Mary-Tyler-Moore in Ordinary People
Mary-Tyler Moore nails it as the self-absorbed Beth. Would far rather play golf than try to understand her son’s mental health problems. Irritated that his suicide attempt stained the grout in her newly renovated bathroom. A perfectly coiffed and hostile maternal vacuum.
3. Debra Winger in Rachel Getting Married
Once we meet her judgemental and hostile mother Abby, we understand more about Kym’s erratic and self-centred behaviour. Debra Winger repeats her performance from In Treatment.
4. Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears PRADA
Most of her screen time is spent abusively grinding poor Andy into the dirt, but yes she is a mother, technically. And hey she did ensure her twins got access to Deathly Hallows before the rest of us plebs. For a card carrying narcissist she sure is funny.
5. Michelle Pfeiffer in White Oleander
Michelle Pfeiffer plays a mother who spends most of her screen time in jail after killing Billy Connolly (hey, she was doing all of us a favour!).
A “free-spirited artist” with a hell of a temper, she doesn’t appreciate dissent, rejection or bad comedy.
6. Ellen Burstyn in House of Cards
The apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree in this chilling portrayal of narcissism by Ellen Burtysn. Now we know where Claire’s moral vacuum and lust for power originated.
7. Barbara Hershey in Black Swan
Giving enmeshment a bad name, Barbara Hershey stars as the stage mom from hell in this overwrought psychological thriller. Struggling to integrate her shadow self, aspiring ballerina Natalie Portman nukes stuffed toys and indulges in elaborate sexual fantasies whilst attempting to individuate from her controlling and seductive mother.
8. Annie Girardot in The Piano Teacher
Failed concert pianist, now piano teacher Erika Kohut (sharing the last name of one of the most important theorists on narcissism) tries desperately to gain the love of her acidic, judgemental mother (Girardot) then transfers her projections onto student Walter. No wonder she is so fucked up.
9. Faye Dunaway in Mommie Dearest
Ostensibly satirical, but apparently true. Christina Crawford, adopted daughter of Joan, dishes the dirt on her famous mom, including why wire coat hangers are so inadequate. A camp classic.
10. Shirley Maclaine in Postcards from the Edge
Another Hollywood character assassination, Carrie Fisher’s comic memoir explores the wackiness underneath Debbie Reynolds. Forced to move back in with her mom Doris after an overdose, actress Suzanne Vale rediscovers Doris’s self-absorption and alcoholism.
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Growing up with a narcissistic mother creates challenges for us well into adulthood. Understanding the legacy and finding the right therapist can help us in our recovery journey.